Flower

 Hi everyone!  Salam kasih sayang. hehe  Rasanya sudah lama tidak post sesuatu di blog yang penuh debu ini. Entah masih ada pembacanya ataupun memang sudah sunyi tak berteman.  Walaupun kemungkinan yang baca ni dalam kadar 0.1% tak mengapa cuz I found it so soothing to rant out whatever I feel without thinking I'm being judge and I think I want to actively back in blogging since I lost interest with my traditional journal.  Well, it just welcome back post. Will try to post interest post this year.  Regards,  Sc

 Episode 2 of PKP written on PKP fasa entah yang ke-berapa ...  Almost 1 year and half for us living with Covid-19 and endless mco, emco repeating over the year.  Let's continue from the last episode part;  So bila unimas keluarkan kalendar akademik yang baru, agak terkesima juga lah sebab everything not happen as what you want.  Masa tu tengah fikir till when you going to stay at college? cuz 4 weeks has passed, you still stranded in Uni. Cuz you can't go anywhere. You've gotta stay at where you are. Ain't sucks tho?  Tapi begitulah, langit tak selamanya mendung ada masa dia cerah juga, masa tu tiba-tiba je Kerajaan announce akan bawa balik student ke rumah masing-masing. Masa ni memang sedih lah sebab I am the one yang terakhir sekali kena hantar pulang ke Sabah. Member yang duduk semenanjung semua dah di hantar balik. Believe it or not I cry after all my stranded friend balik ke rumah masing-masing.  Ingat lagi masa tu Ramadan 2020. For the first ti...

Assalamualaikum everyone. Been almost 1 year hiatus, taking break with busy lifestyle, final project, exam, assignment and so on so forth. I've missin my blog so much! So entry kali ni, maybe agak panjang sedikit. One of the reason because now is 2020 and I am still struggling with my study, but I guess too much memory I need to kept for future my future kids. hihi. Episode 1: My Life As Half Final Year Student I still remember, Week 1- Week 7, a few week before the midsem break start. It was very hectic week. Like how can in week 1 you have so much list-to-do. Still thinking positive at that time because all the subject this year has no Final Exam lot of project need to be done. I am a little bit frustrated during earlier my semester start because my previous academic result wasn't that good enough for me. With non-stop drama from lecturer, but what power I have they are my lecturer and I am their student. That's the fact. Until week 7, where everyone so excited fo...

Assalamualaikum, and greetings to everyone. how are you guys? I hope you guys in good state. Its already one year and few days since I started hiatus back in 27 august 2018, last year. And now, I am in year 3 in UNIMAS and I guess it is tough year maybe? :) Back here to pour whatever inside my heart and chest, which I do not know to whom I should share this story. Well, I'm not really fit to any cliques right now and I am really need some space and time to calm myself. Far from family is never a good thing. Suddenly missing home, homesick in first week of classes. It is hard for me to go through this phase. I just wish that I am with my mother right now. Stay with her side during her hardest time like she did to me when I am at my hardest time. Suddenly get sick right away I'm touch down in Kuching. I can't go back hence money were not enough to buy another ticket. I really want to care of her until she can recover back. But, I have to stay here for my upcoming ...

Assalamualaikum. So I did come back and meet my fellow readers in this entry. May you guys always in a good condition. And get blessing from The Almighty. Sandakan, 26 of August during rainy nights, with stressful mind because of Unimas portal I cannot log in. While tomorrow the registration is open. So I tweet few matters at my Twitter account. Just a Random tweet. Like uols always did. But guess what just happening? Someone butthurt with my tweet 🙂. I just don't get it people. Why do you have to butthurt while I am not mentioning any parties there (In my tweet). Well, not all my life related with anyone else 💆💁. IT IS MY TWITTER ACCOUNT!!!!! KENAPA KAU YANG PANAS AKU TWEET?!!! LIKE FCKNG SERIOUSLY?!! have some guts lah. NOT ALL MY LIFE WERE RELATED TO YOU! BEAR THAT IN YOUR MIND! I have feelings and I cant get angry too. And I hate when I am in the state of anger. So beware. I think i have anxiety to start my new semester later on. Phobia. Scared. And it i...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, Mulakan entry kali ini dengan Lafaz kalimah Agung, semoga yang membaca terus sihat, dan jika sakit menemukan kesembuhan yang Hakiki. Allahumma Ameen 💕 Entry kali ini tidak berat sangat, hanya bertajuk SOCMED: Social Media. (incase you don't know socmed stand for what) There's come a question across my mind in early morning like this, 'How would you understands one's Life when you only go through their socmed' Well, for sure 100% nobody wants to share their real life in their socmed. I am sure and guarantee bout that. The real life Vs Socmed 2 different world. Well, it is really possible for you to share your own 'Main'problem through socmed fight me. Unless you are going to share those happiness bout your life that others don't have. You said you know everything and understand more about people. But Im tellin you, you only go through their socmed and claim you knew everything, the truth is you know nothing about...

Dengan lafaz kalimah Agung, dengan nama Allah yang maha pengasih lagi maha penyayang, Meningkat lagi angka 1 pada hari ini. Alhamdulillah sudah 21 tahun hidup bernafas di muka bumi Tuhan yang Esa. Masih banyak yang perlu diterokai. Luasnya alam dan ilmu Illahi. Bangun pagi, 899 message masuk telefon mula hang satusatu message di baca. Dalam group and yang private message family and friends. Both I love you guys. Ucapan panjang2 semua. Paling seronok dan terharu baca message mereka bila mereka wish tanpa perlu di ingatkan. Tanpa perlu balikbalik meniti di bibir soal 23hb. Tidak perlu. Tidak perlu hari hari bulan bulan di ingatkan. Alhamdulillah. Mereka semua serentak hantar wish panjang yang cukup bermakna tidak pernah pendek dari dulu sampai sekarang. Alhamdulillah. Great friends and family. 💕 Semakin dewasa semakin banyak cabarannya. Moga diri terus kuat bergerak ke hadapan walau ada parasit tepian jalan cuba untuk menghapuskan. Dalam diam. Saying goodbye to Dilo seba...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, Admin mulakan dengan lafaz kalimah agung, Bertanyakan khabar pada yang masih sudi membaca leteran tidak bersuara di laman ini. Alkisah sosok ceritanya, 21 tahun yang lalu, lahir seorang bayi kecil perempuan. Pada waktu siang dalam pukul 10:30 pagi. Anehnya, pada ketika itu semua pening sibuk memikirkan nama buat si bayi. Sehingga mengambil masa seminggu untuk dapatkan nama. Seminggu sesudah itu, lalu didaftarkan namanya ke Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara dan manusia yang berada di kaunter berkata 'Pakcik, skrg dah tak boleh lambat daftar. Hari ni lahir, hari ni juga tarikh diguna.' Si Ayah cuma mampu menangguk tanda setuju. 'tidak mengapalah. Daftarkan saja hari kelahirannya pada hari ini, iaitu 23.07' Sesudah itu, siaplah dokumen penting surat beranak si bayi kecil yang telah didaftarkan hari kelahirannya pada 23 Julai 1997. Kini, dia sudah berusia 21 tahun pada tarikh hari ini. Tapi belum jika mengikut tarikh kelahiran atas sij...

Assalamualaikum And hello fellas. I am back with this really moody feelings. Finally the result for semester 2 is out. Exactly still manage to maintain at pointer 3. But still feeling down just because my pointer turun a little bit. Heh. Its not that I am not grateful. But I expecting at least naik sikit not hoping to get dean award i just hoping better result and better pointer at least. Yeapppp I knew 3 is good enough. Yess good enough for me. Tapi biasalah manusia, mana pernah puaskan? Well, I'm still pujuk myself to be not so broken sebab pointer bukannya jatuh teruk. Well, mistake sendiri jugak siapa suruh tak study time exam en? Sibuk main game. Tp kengkawan smua ingat I am study hard. Well salin nota tp tak ingat apa pun its not consider as study. Tu cuma nak bawa diri lari dari reality je. Well, so padan muka me sebab tak study and get this result. So kena prepared for next semester. New strategies maybe? No lepak2 anymore but stay active like usually. Well, coll...

Assalamualiakum! How are you guys been? I hope uolss in good condition. May Allah bless. It is either Last year, or last 2 year I have post something that similar to this title. Well nerve-wracking always happen when the result of final exam is around the corner! I do not know why. The result always give me headache, stress me because I cant sleep well, eat well and doing my routine like usually. Because my mind just focus on that result. I do not know why. But I guess you guys feel me. Because I do believe all of you feel like what I just feel. Heh. I just hope the best result because I already did my best. Eventhough there are few papers yang hurmmm okaylah we use and applied the tawakal and Redha concept. Oh yaa btw, the other day I ask my ig's mate to vote either what to up for next entry and the result is my year 1 in uni life (freshman year). Well its still undergo editing process and combine ideas edit pictures making video. Well I cannot tell the exact date wh...

Assalamualaikum! How are you lovely readers? I hope everyone would be fine. Because i knew some of you might still in Raya mood. Just like me ;) Well, tewas di raya keenam disebabkan halhal yang tak dapat nak dielakkan. And that time everyone messed up. Di uji saat yang lagi bergembira. But we as a family take it as compliment and take it as a lesson for us. Well whatever happen, I do believe happen for reason. Back to Raya stories, I dont manage to go and reunite with all of my cousin due to unexpected reason. And its make me sad tho. Because Raya is the only time for me to catch up with my own family. In other words 'Family Bonding time' I've scrolled through all the social media; fb, ig, ws stories, twitter. Everyone looking so georgeous with their raya outfit handsome prettt and stunning. You guys slay during raya. While me, hanya mampu tengok and like because I don't have and confident to upload my ootd with kebaya. Well, this year raya were totally d...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim to all the ladies and gentleman. Finally, I got some time to update here after long-long-longggggg day had passed, after met my ex classmate probably my lovely friends. There's nothing story I want to share. Because you know, my heart very sensitive especially regarding to *jeng ... jeng ... jeng* not going to say. so here, a bunch of spamming picture.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, Assalamualaikum and salam sejahtera to all my fellow readers. I thought it is not  long time ago since the last post. But here I am taking a rest from study and pour everything inside my head and my chest to let all of you read about my 3 am thought. Not a serious thought but, a throwbacking to the very painful memory among the painful memories that I have. 5 years. I hate talking about friendship. because of friendship, I start to be strong. Be independent and telling myself that I can live without friend. There are few reasons why that happens. I don't have sweet memory during my high school. I lose my friend and i donno why they HATE ME SO MUCH. I do not know is that they really hate me, or they just don't want be friend with me. I just confuse where do I make a mistake until I lose all of them. Maybe its my mistake without myself realise about it. Then I just walk alone until 2 of my best bestie during high school lend me their own shoulder...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, Assalamualaikum and Salam Ramadhan Al-Mubarak to all my fellow friends. Finally the hectic week just done. And its time for final exam!!! So I am stealing my own time to update here instead of doing some revision for my final.  Guess who is happy going back home in 18 days to go? Compared to the previous semester, this semester more tough than ever. But this semester I managed to handle my endless homesickness. I managed to persuade myself that everythings gonna be okay. I am believing in myself with the Guidance from The Almighty, I manage to handle it. And I thought it was the biggest challenging things for this semester. Busiest semester ever. I guess I should take a short rest whenever it comes to semester 2. It is not all about merit, but the experience that I chased for my future references. Join too much activity until I do not get enough rest for myself. Too many things need to handle in one time. Until up in one point, I'm sick. Fever.C...

Bismilahirrahmanirrahim. Assalamualaikum and hello kuddos. how are you? Mid Sem break just started and I would like to spent some times here after been so long time hiatus. Semester 2 of year 1 and its April now!, I guess I manage to handle my homesickness that never endless. Homesick started right away after three days not in my own home. Choosing living far away from my family wasn't the best choice ever. Even though I want to learn more in others country. But now I am regretting my choice. Live far away from your own home, start to manage your own time, your own class your routine every morning till the midnight, and sometimes it sucks. sometimes the pressure really hit on the nail. Maybe because of few factors like your own roomates or housemate. Its a battle for me to face every one of them with different kind of attitude that sometimes give me an headache, stress and made me become bad woman. I just can't wait to end this semester and get new room after t...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, Stealing my time for update something here after been a while. Since I am also feeling so not well while preparing for my finals this tuesday. #prayforwani Alhamdulillah Done with 365 day for 2017, I have lot of fun and joy for whole of the year. I felt blessed and grateful for everything since I achieved lot of things in 2017 same just like my 2016. Lets recap few highlight moment in 2017; 1. Holiday with family. I do really enjoy all the time spent with my family. Holiday in Sabah and KL. Not really an vacation but short escape. I felt blessed, since it is hard for my family member to gather even in Eidulfitri or Eid-Adha it is really hard.  and last year where all of us can spend the time together, fasting together and celebrate Raya together after been a while.   2. Good Grades Good grades doesn't define your intelligence, yet good grades makes your love ones happy to the max and of course make yourself happy and proud. Be...

Going to BAYU showcase last night, and I am reminding my high school year, meet up and gathers with the high school band. what make me more saddest, after the accident 9 years ago, I can't play piano very well already. :( And of course I remember my partner in crime Iza for study and remember all the keys for drums since I like drum much more better than the guitar. But I like to see people who play guitar well although I can't play it well but I like it. To express something that I really not used to it, only by listening to music, hardcore music sometimes, my cliche never end poem and so on so fort. so many things I have learnt this time. are from the countryside, my own hometown, travelling as a student here in Sarawak teach so many things, maybe I could put it as an main entry for next post. And of course High school were the best memory ever. p/s: Za if you read this, did you still remember our past time? learning and remembering all the notes drum instead of biol...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Been hiatus for some quite time. Busy with assignment, endless classes, quiz, examination and some activity college. Due to this kind of busyness, i recieved some emails and message from anymously regarding their thoughts and feeling. and I have read through some of bio description about someone having difficulty about their feelings and so on so fort. There's stranger on Sarahah and Sayat.me asking me a Question, how I can live happily despite the endless busy life I have. So this is my answer. It depends on how we manage the problem and our schedule. You might saw me happy go lucky person, but deep inside my heart I have tons of problem. Since I am at home but not in my own home, the homesickness is sucks me. I have to cry everyday before I'm sleep. Scare enough if get calls from hometown. And hoping when received the calls it bring some happy news instead of bad news. About heart matter, I do have some heart matter. I mean lovey-dovey prob...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, This is a short entry I guess. 🙇🏻‍♀️ To you, how you define beauty of someone?  Typical Malaysian consider beautiful people, handsome and 'Merecik Hawau' only in fair white skinn while the one who have tanned skin is not beautiful at all.  To be honest, even the fair white skin lady who has lot of pimple in the face they also call them beauty. *I know this kind of girl still looking for solution for their face*. Not included the one who will wear an 5 inch make-up everyday.  How you can define beauty by looking at the physical look? While the inner beauty is more more purest and beautiful things need to look at the first place.  For me, this type of tanned skin woman, man has their own attraction. But hell yeah, not all Malaysian can accept the tanned skin woman/man. Because the narrowed minded has stated that the most beautiful, handsome man/woman is the one who have a kind of fair white skin. And of course the flawless one.  To all ...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim Its been very long Long time for me to update some post here. I am busy preparing myself on the other day before departing to 'Bumi Kenyalang'. It such a hectic week, hectic month but here I am still struggling with tiredness, beauty sleep and study. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Throwing back to 4th Sept 2017, My very first time apart from my family. The tears don't stop for the whole day. As I hug and gave 'Salaam' to my parents, my tears start falling down. The fact that they can't come with me, or even sent me to Kuching all they can do is just sent me to the airports' gate, and that make me cry so hard. I cry so much just like a kid who just lost their candy. 🙁 Along the way to the Airplane, I keep wiping my unstoppable tear, I just can't stand watching both mommy and daddy crying while waving at me before departing. It just few minute while waiting the aircraft, I miss the home already, I miss my mommy and daddys' voice I miss to...